Transformational Coaching with Tania Boutin

It’s no secret that when you are dealing with grief that tremendous stress will be present in your life. When we actually sit down and take note of all the things in our life that create stress within us, we start to see how long-term effects can hurt us. Grief is the top of the list for stress-related anxiety, attitude, and illness. Not dealing with it head-on and burying it can cause many health problems for you. 

Stress Awareness

Everyone encounters negative thoughts, circumstances and setbacks from time to time. However, if you’ve experienced a major loss, the stress from this event may be greater than what is considered the “normal” stresses of life.

Pay attention to your daily routines, emotions and reactions to situations. Do you find yourself:

• Unable to make decisions or to think clearly?
• Only seeing the negative side of things?
• Startling easily?
• Afraid of being alone?
• Self-conscious and overly concerned about what people think about you?
• Unable to sleep or eat, or with excessive pains in your body, headaches, chills or fatigue?
• Consuming too much alcohol, gambling or shopping excessively?
• Unable to control anger or getting irritated very easily?
• Neglecting your responsibilities?
• Avoiding social activities?

If you find these scenarios creeping into your life on a long-term, day-by-day basis, you may have an extreme form of stress. 

Stress Management

Fortunately, there are ways you can manage stress so that you’re turning those negative routines, emotions and reactions into positive habits, thoughts and situations.

Take small steps by slowly incorporating the following suggestions into your life:

• Avoid negative self-talk. As soon as a bad thought enters your mind, quickly replace it with a positive thought.
• Be grateful for all the good people, places and things in your life. It could be a caring friend, a peaceful spot at a lake or the vibrant flowers in your yard.
• Write in a journal. Taking a pen to paper helps release many emotions and feelings you may have pent-up in your mind.
• Enjoy relaxing activities. Listen to music you love, watch your favorite movie or take a leisurely stroll. Allow yourself to unwind and truly enjoy activities you’re attracted to because they will help calm your mind.
• Depend on your inner resources. Rather than relying on mood-altering drugs or other people to make you feel better, look within yourself for the strength to improve upon what you’re feeling now. Only you can control your thoughts, feelings and emotions.

By making a conscious effort to detect stress in your life and manage it when there are clear signs of anxiety, your life will gradually become more peaceful. But, you have to take that first, small step in order to embark on the journey towards a happy and calm life!

When you hear the word LOVE, does it make your heart melt or does it have you running for the hills? For some, love can be a scary feeling, especially if you were raised in an environment where love was not displayed or talked about. Allowing yourself to feel the feelings of love can be an enlightening experience.

When we pour our heart out in gratitude, we are showing our love and appreciation for something. So, when we display our love each and every day by doing things that make us feel joy and purpose, we live a life of love. Taking the time to recognize our feelings and move up the emotional scale to a place of true contentment and love can sometimes seem daunting.  But once we get there, we feel inspired to live our lives from that peace.

Sometimes people feel that love has a price tag. That if we give too much or love too much that you will “owe” someone. Love is unconditional. What do you do to show love? We cannot feel love and hate at the same time. We can feel it alternatively, but we can only choose one feeling at a time. We all do things that feel good and that we love to do, or else we wouldn’t do them.

Here are a couple tools to help you “feel” the love. When we feel love we also end up living happier lives; therefore, many of the same tools for happiness can be the same for sharing and living a life of love.

Gratitude Journal: Keep track of all the things in your life – big and small – that you are thankful for. This way, you start to realize the good and happy things that are happening on a daily basis. Start out by writing five things every night. Move that up to a few more items every week. Soon, you’ll learn to appreciate and LOVE everything in your life – which makes you happier also!

Affirmations: Taking control of your thoughts and bringing them back to a place of contentment is one way that you will be able to show self-love, which in turn will rub off onto the rest of your life. When you take what you’re thinking and turn it around into a positive sentence, things show up in your life that you never would have thought were possible. When you state, “I’m in the process of…..” and finish with what you want from your life, continue to repeat this statement over and over again, until ultimately, you find pure contentment. Use this affirmation when trying to find the perfect mate, as well as any other quest for improving your quality of life! Try it out and you will notice a shift in your thinking. When you notice yourself drifting back to a negative place, start saying the affirmation again and again.

Having a love for others is important, but having love for your own self is ultimate. When we feel true love and satisfaction with ourselves, we can then be able to show others wholeheartedly our love towards them. You are the only one that you can depend on to love yourself, so why would you want to sabotage that? We are all unique and loveable, no matter what has happened in our past. Take control of your thinking today and give yourself the love you deserve. Once you begin to do that, others will take notice and will show and tell you just how important you are in their lives!

Hello Everyone!

Well the time has come! The book that I’ve co-authored in is now released! This book is full of tools, knowledge and information. Check out this valuable table of contents:

You Can Have It All: Running a Business Your Family Will Love By Molly Klipp, AICI

Creating a Family Home-Based Business: Working in Harmony for Greater Success By Grace Keohohou

Growing Your Business While Growing Your Family By Sarah Kalicki-Nakamura, MAOM, CDC

The Gifts in Being a Mom Entrepreneur: Unwrapping the Blessings within the Burdens By Tara Kennedy-Kline, CDC, DCGL, MWP

Launch Your Business to Success: Build a Strong Foundation for Your Business to Grow and Prosper By Rhonda Johnson

Business Planning for the Serious Mom Entrepreneur By Sheri Cockrell

Building Your Legacy by Thinking Big By Teisha Shelby-Houston

Purposeful Profit: The Foundation for a Sustainable Business By Audrey L. Godwin, CPA

Branding: More Than a Buzz Word By Tammy Tribble

Turn Your Image into Gold: Cultivate an Image to Support Your Professional Goals By Jennifer Bressie

The Art of Leveraging Your Time: The Mom Entrepreneur’s Key to Blending Career and Family By Martha Staley, CDC

From Business Suit to Bathing Suit: Mastering Business Travel with Family and Kids By Cindy Sakai, MAOM, CDC

Rediscovering Recess: Create a Game Plan for Adding More Fun to Your Life By Jennifer Malocha, AAS

Authentically You: Making Your Mom Entrepreneur Life Work Using the Law of Attraction By Tania Boutin, CLC, NLSC, SDC

Achieve Your Dreams through Persistence: Know What You Really Want and How to Get It By Karen Tucker, CDC

Baby or Business: Making Time For You Helps Everything Thrive By Leslie Irish Evans, LMP, NBCR, CA

Look Like a Rock Star as You Blog Your Way to SuccessBy Holly Chantal, M.Ed

The Magic of Event Marketing: Skyrocket Your Business with Successful Events By Hope Desroches

Use Networking to Build Your Business through Relationships By Patti Snyders-Blok

Finding and Working with Mentors to Create Success By Schall Adams

Intuition: The Way of the Mommy Warrior Your Secret Weapon in Business and Life By Maria Salomão-Schmidt, MBA

Order your signed copy TODAY! at www.taniaboutin.com

If you’re feeling down about your recent loss, it may be difficult for you to feel grateful early in the grief process. But as time goes on, it does become slightly easier to focus on and appreciate what you do have, rather than what you don’t have in your life.

Being grateful shifts your thinking into a more positive place, helping you gain back energy and your passion for life. Try weaving into your daily routine the following ideas that use gratitude to help you cope with your loss:

• When you wake in the morning, start the day reflecting on what you have in your life to be grateful for. Is it the air you’re breathing? Is it the radiant sunshine streaming through the window? Or, perhaps it’s the lovely aroma of your coffee brewing? Even the smallest things can turn negative thoughts into positive feelings.
• Throughout the day, show gratitude and love for yourself. Think of the challenges you’ve faced and how you’re succeeding in overcoming them. See yourself as a phenomenal individual who is courageous and determined. Allowing yourself to love and accept the person you are helps you to bring your feelings into a brighter light.
• Make a list each evening of the top three things that you encountered during the day that made you feel appreciative of the positive effect it had on your thoughts. It could be someone who reached out to you with an act of kindness, or you had reached out to someone with compassion and concern. Or, maybe it was the giggle of a child or a friend who made you laugh out loud.

Although grief can stem from any type of loss, there are ways to get through the process by being grateful each day for the small, yet beautiful gestures, ideas and inspiring people in your life. Center your thoughts on all the wonderful things that there are to live for, and your mind will gradually transform that grief into gratitude each day.

I would love to continue from my last blog on this topic. Are you one who takes their life too seriously? Always trying to do things perfectly? How has that been for you? Have you gotten where you want to be and do what you want to do? Has that made you stressed out and not enjoying your life?

When we are hard on ourselves to the point that we are not enough, that what we are doing is not bring us joy then we need to take a step back and observe. Taking control of our lives is great and reaching for our dreams but it’s in the “How” we get to that point is where the trouble or exhilaration lies.

By moving ahead fearlessly with passion and purpose to achieve our dreams makes the experience more enjoyable and proficient. How do you ask can this be achieved without stress? By simply living in the moment. Sure you will need to think ahead or look at past trends but by not staying there and focusing all your thoughts there you can steadily move forward. When we accept what is and not examine ourselves with a microscope to make sure that everything is exactly perfect, you will never reach your expectations as there is nothing perfect in life. We can be the best that we can be without the negative chatter in our head to help set us back. Choosing positive thoughts to propel you forward and set your goals into motion can happen once we push past the fear that everything needs to be perfect before we move on.

Once you realize this and take active action towards it, you will see that things in life are really not as complicated and stressing as we make them up in our mind to be. When we have a goal of success, we need to clearly define what success means to us and map that out on paper. Having a plan on achieving our goals and pursuing our passion will help you accept that there will be ups and downs and when things down turn out “perfectly” as we plan that we still need to keep moving forward and push past that bump in the road. When we take “perfectionism” to the next level, and when the little hurdles arise (and they will) it can stop you dead set in your tracks, by being aware of your thoughts and actions and documenting a plan will help you overcome these setbacks.

Remember:

* Change your thinking from a place of stress, worry and perfectionism to positive thinking, using daily affirmations and a gratitude journal. Take notice of what the chatter is going on in your head and switching it when you notice the negativity and every evening have a special journal to write in about what was the best part of your day and what you are grateful for. Once you do this for awhile it will become easier and easier to find a the wonderful things in your life.

AND

* Map out a detailed plan on your goals. You can use the SMART method for setting goals, which is to make your goals Specific Measurable Attainable Relevant and Time Specific. When you have a plan, the little hurdles will still keep you on track and not stop you from moving forward.

Take the road less travelled and set your sights high. You can achieve what you put your mind to. Get to work and set your plan in motion!

Cheers:)

Tania Boutin

Grief Recovery and Life Transformation Coach

www.taniaboutin.com

P.S. You can sign up for my daily affirmations and monthly newsletter on my website! (and there are 2 bonus ebooks!)

Like most people, you head into each New Year with a list of goals that you’d like to achieve in the upcoming year. Do you ever wonder why many of these goals are not reached? There could be many reasons – but one you may want to consider is that you’re not having FUN in the journey!

Think of one goal you’d like to complete at some point in the New Year. How does it make you feel right now? Does the vision of it make you jump with joy, or does the thought of reaching it stress you out and drain your energy? Either way, if this particular goal is truly important to you, you have to organize it in order to have fun with it!

Some of the ways you can find enjoyment in reaching your goals are:

• Stay motivated by imagining the reward. If you only focus on the bits and pieces of the big picture, your enthusiasm about your goal will quickly diminish. Imagine the overall reward of reaching it – what emotions does it bring out in you? Although it may not be easy to attain, if you continually think about the end result, it will motivate you to move forward with a smile on your face!
• Write down every detail associated with reaching your goal and organize tasks into chunks. If you attempt to achieve a goal by tackling items in a disorganized way, then you’ll become distracted. By coming up with an overall master plan supported by smaller tasks with a realistic timeline for each, then it’ll take away a lot of stress in figuring out how to “get it all done” in a simple, measurable way.
• Commit to working on your goal every day. Set aside 30-60 minutes each day to complete one of the tasks within your master plan. This way, you reach your goal quicker and you have a sense of accomplishment when your day is done.
• Take a break from it. Get outside, breathe in some fresh air, meditate or stretch for 15 minutes. Then come back to working on your goal. Sometimes, walking away from something will give you a new perspective when you return to it.

Start this upcoming year by organizing your tasks with an attitude of enjoyment when working on your goals. If it’s something you truly want, then commit to it by envisioning the big picture, setting realistic timelines, working on it every day and at times, taking a break for fresh viewpoints on reaching your goal!

I am looking for 2 dynamic, powerful, hardworking women who want to join my group! Who want to empower other women and show them an absolute positive way to enhance their lives and do this all from home! If that is YOU contact me TODAY and I’ll send you a free video for more information! Email me at: reclaimyourlife@taniaboutin.com www.taniaboutin.com

Do you wake up each January 1 filled with excitement for the upcoming year, but unsure where to begin? You know what you want, but you may need guidance in how to get there. Perhaps you need help balancing your life, managing important relationships or sorting out how to reach your goals. Be prepared for the upcoming New Year by working with a life coach NOW!

A life coach will offer you a safe place to openly share your concerns, while gently pushing you out of your comfort zone so that you have the confidence to continue moving forward in realizing your dreams. She will encourage you to expand your mind and to become stronger in overcoming obstacles.

Are there certain areas in your life that prevent you from moving forward? Maybe it’s stress from: 

• Trying to do it all as a parent, caretaker and employee
• Having no time to yourself
• Finances that may be out of control
• Career setbacks
• Relationships that are not as authentic as you’d like them to be
• Health concerns and habits you’d like to overcome
• Not knowing your purpose in life

Rather than dwelling in despair and confusion, take the time now to start improving your life. A life coach has the knowledge and experience to guide you in overcoming these unsettling issues by working with you on your self-care, life balance, career challenges, money concerns, treasured relationships, health, wellness and your spirit.

Do you know that the Compass Coaching Network is an affordable life coaching community designed to provide you with programs, services, support and advice to achieve results in every part of your life? Visit www.mylifecompass.com/taniaboutin to get in touch with YOUR ideal coach and to start making a difference in your life with your own Compass roadmap!

Imagine waking up this January 1, knowing you’re already on your way to living a life filled with purpose and satisfaction!

Register here: http://taniaboutin.com/services/happiness-generator-workshop/

This is a FUN, and EXCITING workshop where you work on YOUR happiness and nobody else’s. There are activities, meditations and of course, thought provoking questions.

I’ll show you step-by-step how to raise your baseline of happiness.

This means that no matter what happens at work or home — no matter what stress plows into you — no matter how dire the circumstances — you will AUTOMATICALLY return to a higher level of happiness than you have today. You don’t have to get richer, thinner, or smarter to be happier.

I’m going to help you quickly become happier, and remain happy for the rest of your life, which should be a long time, because when you are happy, you are likely to live longer. You are more emotionally healthy, physically healthy, creative, energetic, compassionate, and successful!

All by following a practical 7-step strategy to increase your level of happiness and decrease the risks.

You will learn to automatically generate happiness all of the time. You don’t want to rely on anything else for your happiness. Not achievements, goals, money, relationships, a new car, fancy clothes, other people, or anything else “out there.”

Date: October 20th from 1-3pm EST

Cost: $25 for 2 hrs- includes workbook

Register at:

http://taniaboutin.com/services/happiness-generator-workshop/

“Tania’s Happiness Generator Workshop gives you the awareness and tools you need to make happiness a habit in your life. I learned how to increase happiness by going beyond my mind to confront, accept and let go of negativity thereby allowing happiness to take up permanent residence in my life! Thank you so much Tania for your support and insights! “ ~Diane C.

What have you done in your life that you are proud of? Are you passionate about what you are contributing to this world? What would you do if given the choice of following your passion and living your life on purpose and just living on this earth?

Having self-confidence can mean the difference between living on purpose and just simply being – by going out and pushing past our fears to become the person that we want to be and to achieve our goals. Life is full of obstacles, but how we handle them is usually how we feel our life is perceived. Instead of pushing through barriers, can we simply go around them? Make the choice to step aside from the ongoing path of destruction, push past the fears and turn them into achievements!

Just being ourselves shows a lot more courage than putting on another face so that people will “accept” us so we will conform to society’s beliefs of who we should be. Have the confidence to know that you can achieve your goals and mission in life, while not caring about what other people think!

Having our own opinions and showing we are grateful for what life has to offer us can make our time on this earth more peaceful and loving. Now, when I say “having our own opinions”, I do not mean to forcefully make your opinion known to whoever will listen. It’s having the courage to speak out about how we feel about a particular situation. As we all know, everyone has different opinions and opinions are just different perceptions and beliefs of what we have lived.

Our beliefs are just our habits that we have done over and over again, and that is what we base our perceptions on. So, of course, everyone has different life experiences; therefore, each person has a different perception. What we need to do is to put that to good use to achieve the life we wish to accomplish. One of my favorite quotes is, “What the mind can perceive it can achieve!”

I know you can do anything you put your mind to, but do YOU?